Eye test time.
After two years, it was time to revisit specsavers to be poked and prodded in the eyes while paying for the pleasure. Two years ago I visited when I began to get blinding headaches and was told that my glasses at the time simply didn’t cut it any more. My left eye had ‘degraded significantly’!
THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? Dammit, i don’t want to hear that even if it is true. Butter it up a bit first doc, tell me that my hair looks nice then launch into the news. Actually its just a term meaning my stigmata (i have stigmata now?) has changed, it doesn’t actually mean my vitreous humour is going to pour out at any time.
So all this made me slightly worried before getting to the shop for the test. After having puffs of air blasted into my face, my eye lid yanked up by the optician, fighting back a bout of nervous giggles when she started sticking lenses in the Hans Moleman-esque frame, being blinded by some overly camp short oriental fella and then the ritual humiliation of picking frames with some assistant who has more fashion sense than me, I think I came out of it quite well.
Picking up the new bins next Wednesday.