It was like something from a Hitchcock film…

If this was the BBC news then thats how it would have started. As this isn’t the news I had better start it another way.

I was at Sidegate primary school yesterday to help with the new server install and I made sure i was there nice and early (7:30) as one of the server team said he would be there from 7am.

I wandered around the school yard looking for the team only for a seagull to swoop low over me, then again, then again and again only the next time he dropped some guano about three inches away from my foot. To say this guy was low would be an understatement, i could have reached up and plucked him out of the air (if i fancied my eyes pecking out). In the end i belted to the cover of some trees and he sat ontop of a roof watching me with that evil glint that only seagulls can pull off. Everytime i went out into the playground he would swoop down and buzz me dropping his lunch from the previous day at me. Obviously there is a nest somewhere and they thought i was after some nice, tasty seagull for lunch.
I beat a hasty retreat back to the car and sat waiting for Keith in relative safety.

Lord only knows how the they deal with all the children in the playground during the day.

I have seen the future…

…and its not that good.

There’s an episode of the Simpsons when the schools is having a science fair. Load of ‘hilarious’ things happen but there is a bit when one of the children is trying to play with a model volcano that is being entered but the dad forces them away (i’m being non specific with the gender simply because i can’t remember, give me a break) moaning that he had spent ages working on it and didn’t want it messed up.

So here’s the parallel. ‘She who must be obeyed’ jr has a mad hatters tea party on Tuesday to celebrate one of the teachers leaving and they all got asked to make a hat to wear. So we planned to make it today after swimming. Out comes the card, paper, glue and knife. I kept telling her not to come too close as the glue was strong and i didn’t want her to get messy, or not to touch as the glue was drying and should be left as it is for a while. After a bit she gave up and went upstairs to play and I thought I would do the building and let her paint it.

I’ve just finished spraying it silver and its classy. It looks like something a glam rocker would be proud to wear.

Don’t touch it sweetheart, you may break it.

Sadness

This is something which has puzzled me for years and for some reason its just popped into my mind.
When we used to drive to Wales when I was a wee one, we would often stop at a fish and chip shop on the way. I remember at the time thinking that the open/closed sign was a bit off because when it was open the sign showed a happy fish, but when it was closed the fish looked sad.

Now call me Mr Pointless here but i would have though the fish would be happy the plaice [sic] is shut because its not about to be eaten.